Tag Archives: lie

Procrastinators never learn

7 Apr

Things I should not be doing right now:

Posting a blog.

Oh well…

I may have mentioned this before, but I always feel the need to write on here instead of do schoolwork. You would think after doing school for the majority of my entire life that I would have kicked that bad procrastination habit by now. However, that is not the case, nor will it ever be, apparently. I am just going to have to accept that as a part of who I am. And so will you.

Which reminds me…

You can try all you want to make something work out with someone, to force it, to work at it harder than you’ve worked on anything ever, and you will still be unhappy in the end. You know why? Because one-sided things never work out. Think about it. If they aren’t willing to try, if they can’t accept you for all that you are, then what is the point? Let it go. Somewhere along the way you learn that you have to stop trying to be who they want you to be, and just be who you are.

Will someone ever love me for who I really am?? I don’t know. But I do know I will be happier as me than as me pretending to be someone else. I’d rather be me than a lie.

I think some of the most damaging lies we tell are the ones to ourselves. Those are usually the ones we dont realize are happening until its too late. We think we are so good at fooling other people, but the real joke is on us.

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El. Oh. Vee. E.

31 Jan

Love.

El. Oh. Vee. E.

What with Valentine’s Day coming up, everyone seems to be extra cynical about the whole love idea. Well, everyone who is single. Even the local radio is currently promoting the “Bitter Ball” for those not having “real” Valentine’s plans (which I do actually find pretty clever). Of course, you know its going to be mostly single people looking for hookups, but whatever.

And then there’s the common anti-Valentine’s way of talking about Feb 14th known as “Single’s Awareness Day.” I take issue with this because I don’t see Valentine’s Day as something only for couples. It’s a day about LOVE. And love can be shown to anyone, anywhere, anytime, in a billion different ways…. but that’s a soapbox for later on.

The thing is, at this stage in the love game (and by stage I mean age, and by age I mean 20-something singles), most of us have baggage the size of Texas filled with broken hearts and bittersweet memories (more bitter than sweet). Anyone who has ever loved or cared deeply about someone in a relationship that didn’t work out has come to some sad realizations about love not living up to fairytale expectations. And the result? Cynicism, bitterness, and self-pitty single awareness days.

After so many such experiences, its no wonder we begin to believe that love is a lie. But I came across this quote the other day:

“Love is not a lie. Love is the real deal. The problem is that love is human and its flawed, and despite all the songs and the poems, it does NOT heal all wounds.”

I like it, but I’m not sure if I completely agree with it though. I think OUR version of love is flawed, yes. I mean, God is love, right? And God is not flawed, right? And God does bring healing, right?

I guess I’m going to go ahead and assume that the love talked about in this quote is different than the kind God is. So maybe that is the bigger issue.

If I can learn to give the kind of love that God talks about, then maybe it WILL be a beautiful thing instead of an empty lie that leads to cynicism and bitterness. But I am still human, we all are, and we cannot show perfect love to everyone all the time, if ever. Humans are flawed. Humans break things. We break hearts, we break trust, we even break bones.

Forgiveness

Love

Hope

These are things I strive to show and yet, I do not really understand them. Frustrating. But I know I want to be a part of something bigger than myself, that I want my life to count and have purpose. That I don’t want to fade into the background. Real love is bigger than me. It changes things. So to me, its worth it to strive for that.

As TWLOHA promotes, “love is the movement” – and it IS. Because love is not a magical word full of fuzzy feelings that you can just throw around whenever you want. I mean, for some people it is. But REAL love is choice, its an action, its something you show and give and do. If love isn’t helping other people, isn’t benefiting anyone, then what’s the point? And is that even love?

So spending Valentine’s Day, a day that is supposed to be all about love, in a self-pitty “I’m all alone” party just doenst make sense to me.

For me, love has a lot to do with relationships – all kinds, not just romantic ones. The best way to show love is through genuine relationships with people. I think that is why I like the idea of authentic community so much. I am intrigued by the idea of being a part of a group of people that “do life together” as cliché as it sounds. People who look out for eachother and help eachother and share the truth of Christ and His love with one another in a real way – through actions and support and sound advice (the list goes on).

I want to be a part of a movement. A movement of love that continues to reach more and more people. A movement that introduces people into a growing relationship with Christ. A movement that makes a difference in the world and embraces the future He calls us to.

What would that look like? What would it look like if I deeply invested everything I am into this movement of sharing genuine love with others?